Diary of a Millennial Mama

Over the past few years, I’ve seen several posts from young, child-free Filipinos saying things they definitely will and will never do if or when they become parents. Others are criticizing what some parents are doing, saying it isn’t right, they shouldn’t do this or that to their kids, etc.

Before I became a parent, I was exactly like that. I thought I understood what parenting meant. I thought I knew exactly what I should and should not do when I became one. I also criticized my own parents a lot.

It was only when I became one myself, while losing both my parents almost at the same time, that I truly understood. It’s not as easy as it seems. You can read a thousand parenting books, listen to so many “parenting experts,” but you will never truly understand the depth of a mother/father’s love and the lengths they will go through for their children until you have children of your own.

Becoming a parent opened my eyes to the challenges and sacrifices that come with raising a child. The sleepless nights, the endless worries, the constant juggling of responsibilities—it’s a relentless journey that demands immense dedication. It made me realize that parenting is not a series of checkboxes; it’s a dynamic, ever-evolving process that defies any one-size-fits-all approach.

What you need to understand is that parents are doing the best they can with the resources they have, and there’s only so much they can do. They may not always get it right, and they may make mistakes along the way, but their love and intention remain steadfast. Parenting is a constant balancing act between providing for their children and nurturing them emotionally, and it’s a delicate tightrope to walk.

So to those who are child-free, speak lightly about what you think your parents are doing or did wrong because you have no idea what they had to go through to keep your family afloat. Remember that behind the scenes, they faced their own battles, made sacrifices, and devoted themselves to ensure your well-being. Cherish the time you have with them, for it’s going to be hard to take them back once they’re gone.

Parenthood is a transformative experience that defies preconceived notions. It’s a journey that humbles and challenges you, but it’s also a journey that fills your heart with an indescribable joy. So before passing judgment, take a moment to empathize and appreciate the immense love and dedication that parents pour into their children’s lives. It’s a journey that only those who have walked can truly understand.